Prolonged Torture Stew

Any self-respecting cook should have a prolonged-torture cauldron for slow cooking. This is just one of many possible recipes in which a wide variety of victims can be combined to create one delicious mess.

Ingredients:

• 2 pounds stew meat
• 4 cubed Russet potatoes
• 1 chopped onion
• 25 white mushrooms
• 30 baby carrots
• 2 minced garlic cloves
• 2 (14.5 ounce) cans of beef broth
• 2 tsp Worcestershire sauce
• An assload of salt
• A buttload of black pepper
• A posterior's worth of paprika

Ritual:

Dump everything into your cauldron on high for 6 hours.