Impaled and Severed Fiery Beast Steak

Time: 3 hours

Feeds:  4 ravenous bastards

Hit List:

• 2.5-3 lbs cheap beast steak
• 4 cloves garlic
• 1 tbsp paprika
• Fuckton of salt
• 2 tsp cumin
• 1 tsp turmeric
• 1 tsp onion powder
• Fuckton of pepper
• 1 tsp tabasco sauce
• 1/3 cup red jesus blood vinegar
• 3/4 cup olive oil

Murder weapons:

• Impalers
• Immersion pulverizer
• The box in which holds the flames of Charon

The dismemberment and torture of the beast:

Begin by using your dagger to cut the beast into approximate 1.5” cubes.  Trim all of the fat and use it as bait to catch a carnivore, in which you may also kill and eat the following day.  Place meat into a large sealable bag.

Dump everything else into a container and destroy it with your immersion pulverizer.  Pour into the bag with the ruined beast meat.  Put it in the morgue for two hours.

After 1.5 hours have elapsed, begin preparing your Charon box.  After all of the time has elapsed, string up your impalers with the beast that has been marinating in delicious acid.  You may also stab vegetables of your choice.  Be sure to brush them with oil and coat with salt before placing them above the inferno.

Place the beast meat on the hate grate and sear for about 2 minutes on each side.  Remove and allow to rest before sliding them off of the impalers.  Devour.