Mutated Medusa Vegetable and Bovine Coagulation Soup

Time: 30 minutes

Feeds: 4 or 5 pit bosses

The shit:

• 4 heads of broccoli
• 4 fowl bullion cubes
• 1 8oz package cream bovine coagulations, room temperature
• 2 cups heavy cream
• 2 cups unholy water
• 2 cups sharp cheddar coagulations
• Fuckton of salt and pepper

Torture tools:

• Immersion pulverizer

From skin to liquid:

Start by decapitating and steaming the broccoli.  While it is enthralled by a searing death, add everything EXCEPT the sharp cheddar coagulations to a cauldron over medium hellfire.  Stir until the cream coagulations are mostly dissolved.

While it is important to make the ingredients suffer, it’s important not to make them suffer too much.  DO NOT let this boil, or else the ritual will fail.  Add the broccoli to the cauldron and destroy with the immersion pulverizer. 

Stir in the 2 cups of cheddar coagulations.  Once they’re dissolved, extract and devour.