Basic Charonized Swine Chops

Time: Hours and fucking hours!

Feeds:  Two or three assholes

List of shit:

• 4 Bone in swine chops
• 1 tsp onion powder
• 2 tsp garlic powder
• The vital fluids of two lemons
• 1/3 cup of olive oil
• 1/4 cup soy sauce
• Crushed red pepper
• 2 tbsp bee vomit

Required tooling:

• The box in which holds the flames of Charon

The execution:

Begin by obtaining a large, sealable bag.  Dump all of this shit into the bag and place into the morgue for at least 4 hours.

After the time has elapsed, extract the swine flesh that has been penetrated by the acid and other ingredients.  Ignite a large flame within your Charon box.

When the coals become white hot, thank Satan for the ability to sear flesh, and add the meat saturated with hatred to the torturing grate.  If the chops are about 3/4" thick, cook for 3.5 minutes, then rotate 90 degrees.  After another 3.5 minutes, flip and repeat.  This makes the flesh look like it was tortured by a professional.

Extract and let rest, so the molecules can reabsorb the searing hate fluids that churn within. 

Devour.  Use the remaining bones to pick any stray flesh from the gaps in your teeth.